Unless specifically noted, all roles are open to all regardless of race or ethnicity.

• There are 12 roles that will be played by 6 actors, 3 men and 3 women.
• Four actors in the company are cast in multiple roles, mostly as Ernestine's family members in succeeding generations. By design, the ages of the actors need not be specific.
• The play runs 90-100 minutes without intermission.

• Ernestine Ashworth – Travels from ages 17 to 107. She will be a daughter, a girlfriend, a wife, a mother, a friend, an aunt, a mother-in-law, a widow, a second wife, a grandmother, a great grandmother, and a great-great grandmother.
  The actor cast in the role of Ernestine is on stage for the entire show. She is also actively baking a cake through the run of the play, set entirely in a kitchen in a Grand Rapids, Michigan home.
• Kenneth – Ernestine's awkward and annoying next-door neighbor.
  The actor cast in the role of Kenneth plays only that one role.
• Actor 1 –
  • Alice - Selfless. Strong. Ernestine's mother.
  • Madeline - Troubled. Bemused. Beautiful. Erudite. Ernestine and Matt's daughter.
  • Ernie - Ethereal. Vivacious. She doesn't walk, she glides. Alex's daughter.
• Actor 2 –
  • Matt - Chiseled jawline. A middle linebacker on the high school football team. Ernestine's boyfriend then husband.
  • William - Thirteen. Grand.
• Actor 3 –
  • Billy - Sensitive. An ear for music. Ernestine and Matt's son.
  • John - A man woken up in the middle of the night.
• Actor 4 –
  • Joan - Anxious. Very anxious. Billy's wife.
  • Alex - Takes no bullshit. Billy and Joan's daughter.
  • Beth - John's domestic partner, she quit smoking ten years ago and hasn't been in a good mood since.