I'm Not Rappaport

by Herb Gardner
Directed by Michael Fusco

Production Kickoff: January 29, 2023

Audition: February 05, 2023

Performance Dates

Apr. 21, 22, 29, 30, May 5, May & 6, 2023 at 8:00PM
Apr. 28 & May 7, 2023 at 2:00PM

Unless specifically noted, all roles are open to all regardless of race or ethnicity.

  • Special Note: We kindly request that those intending to audition for the lead roles of Nat and Midge be sure to attend the Kickoff in January 29. There will be a particular audition side that we would like them to prepare for the audition. If attendance is not possible, please contact Michael Fusco (fuscomj831@gmail.com) in advance of auditions.

  • Midge Carter – (M, 50s or older - plays 80; Black) an elderly* black man, desperately trying to hold onto his job as night superintendent of a Manhattan apartment building about to go condo (at least until he gets his Christmas tips) spends his autumn afternoons on a bench in Central Park hoping to avoid an encounter with Danforth, the president of the building association whom he knows is coming to deliver bad news that he’s being involuntarily retired. He’s happy to be a ghost right now wanting little more than to be left alone.
  • Nat Moyer – (M, 50s or older - plays 80; Caucasian) an elderly* white Jewish social justice crusader, re-inventor of himself and spinner of magnificent tales who spends his days in the park calling out and rising up against any injustice whenever he sees it, is not about to let Carter remain invisible and beguiles him into joining him to confront the ”enemy” whether it be Danforth or others such as Gilley and The Cowboy who dare to prey on the weak.
  • Danforth – (M or F, plays late 20s - early 40s) the aforementioned hatchet person for the building owners, is a bit of a yuppie but a decent-enough human tasked with the unpleasant mission of firing Midge.
  • Gilley – (M, plays 20s - early 30s) is the tough-talking bully who extorts protection money from park denizens who fear being mugged by park predators, which, of course, includes him.
  • The Cowboy – (M, 30s - 40s) the Stetson-hatted, befringed, cynical and ruthless drug dealer who prowls the park for customers and terrorizes those, who like Laurie, owe him money.
  • Laurie – (F, 20s - 30s) a damaged young aspiring artist is trying to break her addiction and escape the wrath of The Cowboy to whom she owes lots of money. Nat and Midge attempt to rescue her.
  • Clara – (F, 30s - 50s) Nat's daughter, while still occasionally aiding and abetting her father as he poses as lawyer, union official, etc. to intimidate his enemies, has long ago, abandon the crusade and wants nothing more than to see her father do the same and settle into safe and stable life-style.

* The script describes both Nat and Midge as "about eighty years old" and that's how they should be played, however, Judd Hirsch won a Tony for Best Actor playing Nat at age 50.

In a funny and bittersweet way, the play tells the story of two 80-ish-year-old men who refuse to be marginalized by time, i.e. put out to pasture. They have little in common and, initially, their strategies for resisting the inevitable are very different, however, when they join forces and to launch their heroic but futile counterattacks against their enemies-those who might dare to prey on the elderly and weak - the results are hilarious and uplifting.

As I suspect it is for you, community theatre is my passion and it is my goal that each cast and production team member enjoy the time and effort they invest in creating a show we and Curtain Players are proud to stage.

Over the past 25+ years, I have directed more than 50 plays - 13 for Curtain Players including Leading Ladies; On Golden Pond; Trevor; Cat on A Hot Tin Roof; The Sunshine Boys; and Barefoot in the Park. I am a (mostly) retired lawyer with a BA in English Language and Literature with a focus on Dramatic Literature from Columbia University.


  • Production Kickoff: Sunday, January 29, 2023, 6:30 pm
  • Audition: Sunday, February 05, 2023


Script review, auditions, and performances take place at:
Curtain Players Theatre
5691 Harlem Road, Galena, OH 43021

Curtain Players offers an information session for each of its productions as a help for actors seeking roles, but attendance is not required to audition. The event is an opportunity for actors to become acquainted with the community theatre organization, to discuss the play with the director, and to ask questions about the audition process, rehearsal period, and production plans. Those interested in working behind the scenes are also invited to attend.

Curtain Players conducts open auditions for its productions. Roles are not cast in advance, and, unless specified otherwise in the role's description, are open to all without regard to race or ethnicity. Casting decisions are made by the director and a casting committee comprised of a member of the theatre board, a general member of the organization, and individuals of the director's choosing.

At the audition, cast hopefuls will be given readings (sides) from the script, the page numbers of which the Director will provide at the Production Kickoff or upon request emailed to fuscomj831@gmail.com, and may be asked a few questions and/or given some direction by the director. There may be some individuals asked to read multiple times and some may not. Everyone will read at least twice.

If you come to the production kick-off meeting, you will be given early access to the sides chosen for auditions. There will not be a callback audition for this production. Calls will be made to the actors cast as soon as casting decisions have been made (usually within 24 hours). You will receive a phone call, whether or not you have been cast.

Requests for an early audition for I'm Not Rappaport must be made no later than January 22, 2023.

Questions related to the audition process may be directed to production@curtainplayers.org.

It is my practice to have two table reads prior to the commencement of rehearsals. Between these, I usually will meet with each cast member individually for about 30 minutes.

Prior to Tech Week, we will rehearse Monday through Thursday evenings-probably 6:30 to 9:00. The Tech Week schedule TBA.

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